Tonight I would like the following…
NO BAND PRACTICE IN THE HALL BEHIND OUR HOUSE!! I wouldn’t mind if you were any good but you’re not, and I don’t want to have to coe on over again tonight at 11.30pm to politely request you refrain from playing your music loud anymore – unless you get someone who can sing in tune and more importantly play decent music!
NO MORON ACROSS THE ROAD GETTING DRUNK AND DANCING TO THE ROLLING STONES IN HIS HOUSE AT 1.30AM. There will be much retribution if this is the case again tonight. I am tired and you are the world’s biggest prat, this is not a good combo for you to play silly buggers again tonight.
TO GET SOME F***ING SLEEP FFS! Surely this cannot be too much to ask? I have gone without much sleep for many weeks and it is starting to get on my nerves. Please make it rain tonight, that would be good!
PLEASANT DREAMS, EITHER WAKING OR SLEEPING WILL BE AN IMPROVEMENT!! I kind of got something out of the one with the enormous galleon style ships of the line with enormous Georgian painted faces carved into the backs, this will make a great painting when I get round to it, but the grotesques were stomach churning and not conducive to sleep.
SOME PAIN RELIEF SO THAT I CAN RELAX. These ibuprofens are doing nothing for me so just go away, bug someone else you stupid virus.
Thanks in anticipation of a great evening and night